By Leo Babauta
There’s a energy to our phrase that could be very typically underdeveloped — phrases are magic, and might create the world round us. However most of us use this magic as if it weren’t highly effective.
The primary method we see that is that we regularly don’t honor our phrase to ourselves.
In his great e-book, The 4 Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz places “Be impeccable along with your phrase” as the primary and most essential of the 4 agreements that may change your life. There’s much more depth to this settlement, “Be impeccable along with your phrase,” than you may first notice … however I’m solely going to cowl one facet of that: honoring your phrase to your self.
Some methods we don’t honor our phrase to ourselves:
- We are saying we’re going to train immediately, however then put it off as a result of we’re busy.
- We vow to cease consuming so many sweets, solely to provide within the subsequent day and eat a bunch of ice cream and cookies.
- We are saying we’re going to work on a significant venture, however that retains getting pushed again one other day, and one other, till months have passed by.
- We are saying we’re going to meditate, however as an alternative test our telephones or electronic mail.
None of that is “dangerous,” and it will be a misuse of our phrase to harshly criticize ourselves for any of this. However what if we might begin to honor our phrase to ourselves?
What if, after we inform ourselves we’re going to do one thing, we really comply with by and do it?
What would that change for you, in your life?
If you happen to might 100% belief your self to honor your phrase to your self … this might change every little thing.
Let’s have a look at how one can develop the ability of our phrase to ourselves.
The Observe of Honoring Our Phrase to Ourselves
Begin by committing your self to take your phrase to your self as sacred. It’s a vow, and once you say it, you’re totally dedicated to it.
Remind your self of this every time you’re about to interrupt your vow to your self.
Then begin by solely making small guarantees to your self — issues you realize you possibly can positively do. And comply with by on each single promise, again and again, with full dedication.
For instance: promise to go and drink a glass of water, after which do it. Promise to reply this one electronic mail, then do it. Promise to go for a stroll across the block, then do it. Small guarantees, after which take them as sacred.
Take away the potential of not doing it. My coach says if you happen to’re a mother or father, you don’t even query whether or not you’re going to feed your children or not — it’s a dedication you don’t query. Deal with your commitments to your self in the identical method — unquestionable.
Whenever you do it, acknowledge your self for honoring your phrase to your self. It is a victory to be celebrated. Even when it’s a tiny victory, it’s essential.
If you happen to mess up, honor your phrase by acknowledging the error, and apologizing. Take duty, with out blame or disgrace. After which commit your self to rising from this error.
Solely when you’ve gotten good on the straightforward guarantees must you go to more durable ones. As a substitute of promising to jot down for an hour, promise to jot down for five or 10 minutes. As a substitute of making an attempt to meditate for an hour, simply meditate for five minutes. Identical with train, or something that requires focus. Small guarantees, executed impeccably.
Don’t make indefinite guarantees — like that you simply’ll by no means contact one other drop of alcohol. Make small guarantees, such as you’re not going to eat a cookie for the subsequent hour. Then make the guarantees simpler to satisfy — do away with the cookies, or take away your self from the neighborhood of the cookies.
Over time, if you happen to work on growing the ability of your phrase, it is going to develop into one thing you don’t query. After which your phrase can be like a robust magic spell you possibly can solid anytime you could make magic occur.